


The Sun in the Morning

by TheCityLightShow



Series: What Was Lost (And What Was Found) [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Fluff, Canonical Character, F/M, Gen, Healing, Lily Evans Potter Lives, M/M, Mentioned Major Character Death, Mourning, implied Sirius Black/James Potter - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-07
Updated: 2019-02-07
Packaged: 2019-10-23 23:38:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 966
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17693342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheCityLightShow/pseuds/TheCityLightShow
Summary: “Did I ever tell you that James was my first kiss?”It's November 1981.James's sacrifice meant that Voldemort couldn't touch Lily or their son. Lily and Sirius sit on the roof, and try not to let it hurt.





	The Sun in the Morning

**Author's Note:**

  * For [dayzor (tarot_card)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/tarot_card/gifts).



> So this is a product of my weird trains of thought, and my friend's fantastic enabling abilities. After wondering, if Lily's sacrifice meant that Voldemort couldn't touch Harry, and Harry's sacrifice in the Deathly Hallows meant Voldemort's curses wouldn't hold on his friends, then why didn't James's sacrifice mean that Voldemort couldn't touch Harry AND Lily? This was born. 
> 
> Sirius, Remus and Lily, attempting to group raise lil Harry with happiness, and wondering how to fill the hole that's been left. 
> 
> I'll probably tag more on to this in a series.

# November, 1981

 

“Did I ever tell you that James was my first kiss?”

 

It takes a long moment for the words to register in Lily’s mind. She still feels a kind of hollowness as she turns to look at the man taking a drag on his cigarette beside her, but she can’t deny she’s curious. “No-,” her voice doesn’t actually make a sound, and she clears her throat to try again. “No, you didn’t.”

 

Sirius just hums, and offers her the cigarette, like he always used to and like the world wasn’t ending – hasn’t ended. He’d climbed up on the rooftop beside her some time ago; Remus is probably still downstairs. She doesn’t take it, which is new, but she can’t, not when she should be passing it off to-. “In fourth year. The Christmas we stayed behind.” He’s looking at her expectantly, but Lily can only nod, not sure what she’s meant to be inferring from it, until-.

 

“My enchanted mistletoe!” The exclamation loses something to her sore throat, but Sirius’s face still flickers in a small smile. “I’m still proud of that.” She admits, but it’s hardly a confession. The mistletoe had stalked close pairs for most of December, until eventually they stood _just_ right underneath, at which point it would tinkle like a bell, and get louder, until eventually it would let out a noise like a banshee – only stopping when it got its kiss. Who _wouldn’t_ be proud of creating that?

 

“So you should be.” Sirius tells her. He puts the cigarette out on the roof tiles, and silence falls again. It’s quiet out here, outside but still under the fidelius charm, all the outside sound shut away. This time she herself is the secret keeper; Sirius and Remus are the only people she can stand to let inside. The horizon is steadily gaining light, and the realisation that it’ll be dawn soon and she might not be able to hear the birdsong hurts more than it should. That after everything, she can’t at least have that. “He was a terrible first kiss.” Lily can’t help her burst of laughter, and Sirius has a ghost of his old grin on his face.

 

“I doubt you were much better.” Teasing him feels so easy.

 

“Please, of course I was.”

 

“Was not.”

 

“Was too.”

 

“Was not.”

 

“Was too!”

 

“Was not!” Lily’s smiling and it hurts, but Sirius links their hands together and it hurts a little less. She squeezes his hand lightly – his knuckles are bandaged from where he punched a wall the other day, and she doesn’t doubt that his chest is littered with bruises and curse-marks from the fighting he’s been doing for the last few weeks. He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named might’ve disappeared in front of her very eyes, but there was still the rest of his followers to think about. People were still cautious – it was impossible not to be.

 

“I loved him.” Sirius has his held tilted back and up to the sky. “Not like you love him, and not like… Remus and I. But he was always more than just my brother.” Lily squeezes his hand again, and he simply threads their fingers together to squeeze back tightly. “I thought- I never imagined…” He trails off, but Lily knows exactly what he means. One of them has to finish the sentence though, or it feels like they’ll be stuck in this moment forever. The words are caught in her throat.

 

“That we’d have to live a life without him?” The voice isn’t theirs, and it’s wry and it’s cracked. Lily leans around Sirius and finds that Remus has half hauled himself from the skylight. Always, there is Remus, to finish the things they’re a little too afraid to, because he’s a man who’s had bravery forcibly burned into his blood and he can’t let them go. His scars always look so stark in the moonlight, but tonight they seem soft with a lingering sadness.

 

Sirius nods absently, and Lily can’t help but watch as he drinks Remus in, as his shoulders relax and he marvels that Remus is still there. Lily can’t find it in herself to be jealous, no matter how much it hurts. Remus climbs the rest of the way out, still as lanky and as skinny as he’d been at Hogwarts. So much hasn’t changed, even with the world torn asunder. He moves carefully, and settles himself behind them, between them, back against theirs. He rests his head against their shoulders, and Lily leans in. This is what she has now. Her boys.

 

“How’s our Harry?” Lily asks him softly.

 

“Your infernal cat is curled around him, and he’s sleeping nicely.” Remus assures her. “I’m more worried about you two catching hypothermia.” Sirius gives a small snort.

 

“It’s not that cold up here, Moony.”

 

“Speak for yourself.” Lily grumbles, realising what an idiot she is for climbing up here when her little boy needs her. Remus’s shoulders shake a little as he gives an almost inaudible laugh. “You two-,” she starts, and then stops. To ask lets them have opportunity to tell her no.

 

“Lils?” Sirius asks, squeezing her hand.

 

“You’ll stay with us, right?” She asks – her voice cracks on the last word. Harry needs them. She needs them. She never thought she’d have to do this on her own.

 

“Of course, we will.” Remus says, twisting ever-so-slightly to kiss the side of her head. “For as long as you need us.”

 

“You won’t be able to get rid of us.” Sirius promises – and it’s the final straw.

 

 

_“Will it really not be that different after the wedding?” Sirius had asked. “Marriage changes people.”_

_“You won’t be able to get rid of us that easy, Padfoot.” James had promised._

 

 

Lily lets her tears fall as the sun rises.

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't written Harry Potter fanfic since I was over on fanfic.net, and I always thought it would stay that way. I should've known better. For those following me for Marvel who read this anyway? You're the greatest, and I should have something for you soon. For people just dropping by? You're also pretty damn fantastic. 
> 
> Come drop me a line! Comments are cool, and I'm still on the hellsite fantasia that is **[tumblr](http://thecitylightshow.tumblr.com/)** , and you can totally just come yell at me over these nerds. Please, come yell at me over these nerds.


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